The Hot Challenges

[mabudon]

As I said on facebox (and on the descriptions and in the video etc) I was recently watching that Man vs Food program. Overall, it seems the "challenges" are generally presented fairly close to what they actually entail. A few of them were obviously super exaggerated- a good example is one where he supposedly eats a 2 gallon sundae which looks like it couldn't even be one gallon (this is backed up by another challenge where he has to eat X number of milkshakes, the total volume of which is barely even an actual gallon, and he fails)

So sure it's television, but the guy is such an unfunny, mugging goofball that his theatrics tended to get to me from time to time. This got the worst when I saw him attempt "hot challenges". The first I saw was talked up like crazy, "so hot nobody dares" and all that- but when the actual hot elements were described, it was clear that it was supposed to kill people who think wonder bread has a "good kick". The lack of hot didn't stop him from putting on a shameful show, pretending to be suffering and having to rise to great heights of manhood in order to force his way to victory.

I complained so much that Elf (who is a Man V Food apologist) basically told me to put my money where my mouth is and prove that the "challenges" he was facing were easily possible for even a mere mortal such as myself. Challenge accepted.

The first such challenge was pizza with an irresponsible amount of El Yucateco XXX Habanero sauce. It is a great tasting sauce, all natural and made to some Mayan recipe, doesn't even have colouring in it so it is a kind of brown colour.

Elf was to put the sauce on my challenge pieces, but she didn't realize that there was no little widget to keep the sauce from just comin out willy nilly, and ended up putting most of a bottle on a few slices of pizza- the effect was more like pizza swimming in fire-hot gravy, as you can see in the vid.

I suggested she try a bite to see what she had been responsible for, and she agreed, and this video is the result.



I didn't even bother having my attempt filmed- it took me maybe 15 minutes but I powered through the remaining pizza and it was fucking delicious, tho truly bracing hot-like. Next I will post my own run at some Scotch Bonnet "poppers" that we whipped up to help me build my courage

[jjreason]

Just don't post the "12hrs later, THIS happened!" video - I can hear the screams from here, no need for more proof.

[anarky]

No joke. I can do one habanero, no problem, but my survival instincts usually kick in and prevent me from eating more unless there's money on the line. Three, man, your ass is going to be sore for a month.

[Turdeto]

AH YES! FINE CANADIAN DOON!

[mabudon]

honestly if you are careful about building a proper "base" there is no afterburn, no joke. The WORST for causing that sort of thing, from my experience, is anything with previously dried peppers in it.

Anyways, while we prepare for todays challenge, here's another previously recorded bit. We made some special popper type things out of mostly jalapenos stuffed with refried beans (goosed up with habanero powder) and cheese. Also on the platter, 3 scotch bonnet peppers stuffed with same. I totally survived with relative ease, but I would be lying if I claimed that it wasn't pretty fucking hot.



In a while, me and Elf are gonna eat some raw peppers, she is hoping to eat a whole one (and as a concession for her stepping up, she CAN remove the seeds but NOT the white pith-bits). We only have 3 in the pantry, so I am not sure if I am gonna go for one or 2. The next challenge will be much, much more fiendish

[mabudon]

Here is Elf eating a scotch bonnet, fun fun


Anarky, you were asking about them "poppers" on the facebox- I don't so much use recipes as I just know how food works and what I am aiming for and usually it turns out perfect-ish.

I took the peppers and chopped the tops off and set em aside, got a frypan hot, put a splash of oil and tossed in a chopped onion then took a can of beans (think they were pinto beans) and rinsed them and added them to the frypan once the onions had sweat out a good bit. Once the beans get warmed up a bit, I added cumin, salt, black pepper, garlic (both powdered AND fresh), some habanero powder and I think some oregano, then smush the beans into a paste and wait til it smells exactly right and then they are done. Let the beans cool down, then grate some cheese and mix it with the beans and stuff it into the peppers, then put them on a baking sheet or what have you and put them in the oven (I guess around 350-375) for maybe 10-15 minutes, then let them cool off and then eat them however you like.

[unlimitedpudding]

You should have a toast challenge.











...And don't forget to vote for the ShamWow Carnie guy for Vice President in 2012.

[mabudon]

So I joined a hot pepper forum at the urging of my buddy from Alberta. He ordered a bunch of seeds to grow this year and ended up not starting them, so I figured I was not gonna get to challenge the super hot peppers this year. My buddy kindly hooked me up with a friend somewhere in the US who has a huge crop of deadly hot peppers growing, many different proven varieties including the "Butch T" Trinidad scorpion.

I dunno when they will ship, but I am officially kinda scared

[unlimitedpudding]

May the diety of your choice have mercy on your anus.

[Snigtad Flornbi]

MY NUTS R HOT, U CAN SUCK THEM!!

HA HA, BURRRRRN, I GOT U GOOD, U FAGGET!!! I CAN SIND U SOME JAZZ IN THE MALE, IT SHOD B THEIR B4 U FINISH FUCKIN UR BRUTHER.!

[anarky]

Okay, slightly off-subject, but I've discovered why the "jalapenos" usually served with pho at Vietnamese restaurants are so fucking hot.

They're not jalapenos (3500-8000 Scoville units). They're serranos (10000-23000 Scoville units). Eat one without being prepared for "this thing is fucking hot," and you'll be in pain. I'm not trying to make or perpetuate an ethnic stereotype here, but most southeast Asians I've met (who aren't Twinkie-fied) make no distinctions among peppers, and call all small green ones "jalapenos."

Looking at the Wikipedia entry for the Scoville scale, I see no issue with the rankings, though I still think the criteria for getting there is ridiculous (how many glasses of milk did you need to drink after each pepper?).

I've not gone hotter than habanero/Scotch bonnet, but I have some dried ghost chiles (if the guy who sold them to my cousin was honest, they're the legendary Bhut Jolokia). I haven't found a use for anything hotter than habanero yet.

It's funny that habaneros are probably the tastiest peppers, but the heat is so fucking intense it's tough to appreciate the flavor.

[mabudon]

Found some dried Ghost Peppers in my fave specialty food place today. They look like the real thing alright. I can taste the fear

[vynsane]

finally got a chance to watch these. this reminds me of our trip to buffalo - we hit the anchor bar, the originator, and duff's, which is another place that my sister-in-law swears is better (mainly because it's on grand island, where she grew up )

the missus and i both agree that anchor bar's are better. however, duff's sauces are like an entire echelon above anchor's - their mild is comparable to anchor's hottest. i had an entire basket of duff's hottest (minus the one that the missus had), which impressed not only my sister-in-law but the waitress as well.

[Turdeto]

Careful with those peppers. You don't want to turn your underwear into a mud hammock.



Or do you?

[mabudon]

for my non-facebox friends here, a pic of what was dropped in the post yesterday
THAT is a dangerous shipment...