I fucking hate those middle of the mall kiosks.

[Slicker]

Every fucking time I go to the mall they try to sell me some shit. Just because I'm like a fucking foot taller than everyone else at the mall makes me a damn target. I've literally had the same foreign fuck try to call me over on 3 seperate occasions.

The only damn reason I go to the mall is to look at the unattainable muff.

[Antropov]

My favorite middle-of-the-mall-kiosk-guy is the poor bastard who has to rub lotion on people's hands. ICK!!!

[Slicker]

That's the one that keeps coming up to me. It's some Israeli fucker (I actually gave a fuck the first time and heard his story out before I told him no) and he's selling some salt scrub "made with the salts from the Dead Sea".

Bullshit. It's just fucking dial hand soap with rocks in it.

[kidhuman]

My favorite one is the one selling the Kung-Fu movies.

[Diabolical]

Slick, next time just say really loudly "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU FUCKING PEOPLE NO!"

The cell phone people bug me too.
"Hey man, you got a cell phone?"
"Yes."
"Is it (fill-in-the-blank company the jack ass works for)?"
"Ha ha ha! Fuck no!"
*keeps walking*

[mabudon]

I hate the ones here cos the local malls are kinda on the small side, and they CRAM the fucking things in so that there is only a one-person-wide strip on either side, so you end up either bumping in to lots of folks, or tripping on tiny kids, or quite often having no place to get out of the way but to actually go into/around/through the fucking things...
Just yesterday I damn near flattened this stupid remote-controlled thing that looked like a bow-tie with knoby tires on it that some wacky oriental-looking guy was driving around in the central area of hte place I was in- I was wearing my combat boots and when the thing came whirling out underfoot from behind the booth I damn near stomped the thing into a million pieces (which would have made for a funny scene, so I may have to walk by that booth again while the chance exists)

[anarky]

I think the one with knockoff video games is funny. It's a console that has something like 50 old NES games for $25. They have a demo set up, where you can play Super Mario Bros, Contra (NES version), or Duck Hunt.

However, there's a big sign that says "No refunds, no exchanges." Given that these are clearly unlicensed, no way in fucking hell am I buying them with that policy. I have nothing against knockoff games, but I find it weird that they can sell them so openly. And I'm sure they're knockoffs, because Nintendo is one of the most anal companies around when it comes to their trademarks and such.

[Antropov]

I actually had a kiosk pay off tonite. The Peppridge Farm folks are set up for the holidays and I got a free sample from some hot chick (I wanted to ask her to sample <i>my</i> meat log, but I think the Mrs. might have had something to say about it).

[jjreason]

I was going to say that I DON'T hate them, because they usually have some hot teenager sitting on a stool with those hip-hugger black pants on showing off the t-bar, but Cap's post was much more "to the point".

[Antropov]

Ah, yes. The leaning-forward-on-a-stool-while-wearing-a-short-shirt T-Bar (or whale-tail, if you're Chux[beard]). I don't think there will ever come a time in my life when I don't crane my head to see if she's-a thongin'

[Slicker]

I would've been fucking ecstatic if this had been my case But I got some hairy Israeli guy that I could barely understand. Those hot chicks never talk to me.

[Snigtad Flornbi]

Anarchy wishes their was one where he coulkd go and fuck his momma while his daddy kicks him in the nuts.

[anarky]

I was at the mall the other day, and who did I see manning one of these kiosks but our own Snigtad Flornbi? I was surprised and, even though I didn't want him to recognize me, I walked over to scope it out while he was trying to give candy to a little boy in exchange for something I'd rather not think about. The kiosk was called Doosh It Up, and he was selling naked pictures of David Hasselhoff signed by JediTricks. The pictures were overpriced, even at $1. For an extra fifty cents, he'd toss your salad, too, while humming "Battle Hymn of the Republic." Pretty freaky shit. There didn't seem to be any buyers aside from CaptainSolo1138. Y'know, I think I'll just drive the extra few miles to go to a Snigtad-free mall next time.

[kidhuman]

Hit off Valley View Mall, its Snigtad free.

[Antropov]

<blockquote id="quote"><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica" id="quote">quote:<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"><i>Originally posted by anarky</i>
<br />There didn't seem to be any buyers aside from CaptainSolo1138.<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></font id="quote"></blockquote id="quote">I just wanted the picture. Snigs threw in the butt munchin' for free.



BTW, the 'Hoff and JT say "Hola"!