What's up with the pathetic remakes of shit

[Tom Foolery]

While I can certainly tell the diff between a legitimate hot nerd girl and a poseur just wearing glasses, if she's nekked and getting plowed--don't much care.

[anarky]

NBC is remaking The Sound of Music. With Carrie Underwood.

Do they not realize this is just asking everyone to mock them for their stupidity?

Bonus fact: You can immediately spot a moron on social media by whether they seem open to the existence of this, or voice their disapproval with "I love Carrie Underwood, but...."

[Ran]

http://io9.com/hollywood-now-has-three- ... 1463273841

Hollywood now has three Peter Pan movies in development

Joe Wright (Pride & Prejudice, Hanna) is making a Peter Pan origins movie, instead of the dark live-action Little Mermaid adaptation he was previously signed up to do.

Wright and Arrow producer Greg Berlanti will adapt a Peter Pan script by Jason Fuchs (Ice Age: Continental Drift), which reportedly has people at Warner Bros super excited. I hope they call it Let's Kill All the Fairy Tale Projects, Bury Them in the Ground, And Set That Ground Ablaze Until We Deliver A Little Mermaid Movie.

Note: There are already two other Peter Pan movies in play: Columbia is developing a Pan movie and Disney is adapting Peter and the Starcatchers. So that's good news for J.M. Barrie fantatics, we guess.

[Tom Foolery]

We don't have a reverse version of this topic, where the original is pathetic and the remake is bitchin'. So I'm posting this here.

Picked up Dredd at WM today for $10. I was delighted with what they did. Dredd takes rookie Judge Anderson out on her first day on the job, and they get locked inside a MegaBlock run by drug dealers and have to fight through 200 stories of gangs and killers. Karl Urban is great as Dredd. He plays it straight without tipping into lampoon. And Olivia Thrilby is hot as Anderson. Lena Headey is the leader of the dealers. I wish this had done better at the Box Office (it did $35M on a $50M budget) because I'd love a sequel (I know there's some kind of grassroots/Kickstarter attempt to get a sequel made). It's bloody and violent as you'd expect from Dredd and they leaned towards realism as opposed to the campy comicness of the Stallone version.

Minor (and I mean minor, teeny tiny) quibbles. It's only 90 minutes, the satire the Dredd comics are known for is almost entirely absent, and some of the blood SFX are just a little too CGI. But those are seriously minor. I'd rather see Dredd played too straight like in this film, then overly campy like the previous attempt.

It's worth checking out if you love the source material. You'll be happy.

[Tom Foolery]

They're making a sequel to It's a Wonderful Life where George Bailey's grandson is visited by an angel and shown how much better life would be if he'd not been born.

What the fuckity fuck??! That's about as gigantic a shit you can take on a beloved film as is conceivably possible. If you're going to make a film with that premise, fine. But why on Mt Olympus would you give it that title and bill it as a sequel?!? Fuck you, everyone.

[anarky]

As I put on FB:

Oh, please, please, please let this be directed by Michael Bay and star Seth Rogen and Megan Fox, and put in lots of explosions to hold together the flimsy Orci/Kurtzman script that involves an invasion by time-traveling dinosaurs who were recruited by the Nazis in the 1940s but frozen in ice until the 21st century, and definitely include a wisecracking, jive talking robot buddy voiced by Kanye West, who also performs all the music.

Because if you're going to crap on a classic, why hold back?

Doesn't showing someone the world would be better if they HADN'T been born kinda negate the original? Is God an asshole, sending angels to convince people to kill themselves?

[Diabolical]

So, the It's A Wonderful Life "sequel" ain't gonna happen.
Paramount owns the distribution and sequel rights, and they weren't the blowhards claiming to be making the sequel.

[Diabolical]

Ha!

Spike Lee's Oldboy remake got dumped in to 583 locations this weekend. Without much of a marketing push, the movie tanked with just $1.25 million for the five-day frame ($850,000 three-day). Based on these terrible results, it's unlikely the movie hangs in theaters long enough to make it past the $3 million mark, making this one of the biggest bombs in recent memory.

Oldboy was beaten by a movie called Black Nativity.
Yes, Black Nativity is a real movie.

[anarky]

Interesting. Is it supposed to be bad? I have heard nothing about it other than the fact it was being made, and that was a while back.

[Diabolical]

I dunno. The original is held in pretty high regard, so most people's reaction to this was "Why?"

[anarky]

I somehow didn't realize they were re-making Godzilla AGAIN and just saw the trailer.

Did we not learn anything as a society from the Broderick turd? Because this looks rather the same. The only thing I can say it looks like Hollywood actually learned from that mess is that not showing the monster at all in trailers was a mistake (because, Hollywood being Hollywood, they actually thought that was the problem with the 1998 movie, and not that it WAS INCREDIBLY FUCKING AWFUL!!!).

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

I somehow didn't realize they were re-making Godzilla AGAIN and just saw the trailer.

Did we not learn anything as a society from the Broderick turd? Because this looks rather the same. The only thing I can say it looks like Hollywood actually learned from that mess is that not showing the monster at all in trailers was a mistake (because, Hollywood being Hollywood, they actually thought that was the problem with the 1998 movie, and not that it WAS INCREDIBLY FUCKING AWFUL!!!).

I dunno, I thought the trailer was pretty good. I haven't seen Gareth Edwards' Monsters, but apparently it was good enough for him to get the director gig here. Whether or not it needs to exist is a matter of opinion, but I doubt it'll be anywhere near as bad as the Emmerich version.

I just want to see Walter White vs. Godzilla. Cranston's barely in the trailer though.

[Diabolical]

I dunno, I thought the trailer was pretty good.

I thought it looked pretty good also. I'm not getting too excited though, based on the last attempt, but so far I'm willing to give it a shot.

I haven't seen Gareth Edwards' Monsters, but apparently it was good enough for him to get the director gig here.

I liked Monsters quite a bit. Very impressive flick made for next to nothing.

I just want to see Walter White vs. Godzilla. Cranston's barely in the trailer though.

Walter White vs. Godzilla? No. Heisenberg Vs Godzilla.

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

Walter White vs. Godzilla? No. Heisenberg Vs Godzilla.

You're goddamn right.

[Tom Foolery]

They're making Gilligan's Island into a movie. And for some reason, the name of that unfunny fat ass Josh Gad is being bandied about for Gilligan.

Why and How do you make that a movie? Figure its a 100 minute long movie. You kill half an hour introducing the characters, they get shipwrecked. And then 45 minutes later they get rescued in the finale. Being stranded on an island for 45 minutes is not a big fucking deal.

Plus they already remade it for Television. It was called LOST.