What's up with the pathetic remakes of shit

[Diabolical]

Tarzan and the Lost City (1998)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120856/

[Ran]

Dredd 3D. This brings up the question: when the title says "pathetic remakes of shit", is it inferring the original or the remake is shit?

[Diabolical]

Calling Dredd a remake is like calling Batman Begins a remake.

[RoIIo Tomassi]

I'm going to say Dredd 3D is automatically better. Because it lacks Rob Schneider.

[anarky]

I did like the part where Shneider was mocking Dredd, saying, "Ah yam da lore!!" But it was so incredibly wrong for an actual Judge Dredd movie.

[RoIIo Tomassi]

The only part I thought was cool was when Max VonSydow takes his "final walk" into the Wastelands to bring Law to the lawless. Ohmigod! Right there you're on your way to the 10% that was good in the Campy Judge Dredd movie.
Schneider makin' fun of Stallone's slur = 1%
Max VonSydow in a duster with a big gun = 1%
Diane Lane is hot = 1%

Only 7% to go!

[anarky]

1% because Armand Assante is badass and probably had no idea what the fuck he was getting into when he signed on.

[RoIIo Tomassi]

I'd give him another 1% because after he figured out what he was in, he commited to the hammiest over the top performance he could manage. That man stuffed a napkin in his collar, grabbed hold of that knife and fork, and started chewing scenery.

[vynsane]

apparently the makers of the new Robocop liked Iron Man so much they asked Rhodey if they could borrow War Machine.

[Tom Foolery]

What's up with his right hand?

I thought we agreed, full body prosthesis.
Lose the arm.


But no seriously, if the arm from shoulder to wrist is robot, then how is the hand still flesh? And if not, then that arm isn't Robo. It's ArmorCop. BOOO! Hiss!

[vynsane]

i'm thinking it's just a shot between takes - he needed to take off the robo hand in order to rub one out or something.

[Slicker]

A Robocop remake? Seriously? You can't remake perfection!

[anarky]

he needed to take off the robo hand in order to rub one out or something.

Are you saying he bought one for a dollar?

[RoIIo Tomassi]

Rub one out? Isn't that what they have all those Fluffers on set for?

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

I watched the 1987 Robocop for the first time last night on Netflix. I get that it's supposed to be a satire, but it comes off as a little more on the plain-ol'-goofy side than the satirical right off the bat, which might have been their intention. I'm not sure. It's incredibly dated to the late '80s in terms of the effects, politics, and overall style, so I can't say I blame them for wanting to take the idea and update it to the modern world (though I'm sure that wasn't the original intention of the remake). I'm sure it's going to be grim and largely humorless, with the ironic peppering in of some of the catchphrases ("Dead or alive, you're coming with me" and "I'd buy that for a dollar!"). The Batman-meets-Iron Man suit isn't very interesting. And were they just using Murphy's face grafted onto a robot, or was his brain in there, or what?