What's up with the pathetic remakes of shit

[vynsane]

And from the trailer I saw, the new Nikita can only fight evil spies and whatnot when she is missing several articles of clothing.

and the problem there is.... ?

[Rollo Tomassi]

I took the kids to see the new Karate Kid movie. It's long at 2 1/2 hours, but I enjoyed it. Technically it should have been called the Kung-Fu Kid since it takes place in China and the kid learns Kung-Fu and beats ass in a Kung-Fu tournament at the end, but I suppose brand name recognition of the 'Karate Kid' franchise was a wise move on the Studio's part.

I put this in the pathetic remakes thread, because it is sorta a remake, and although it wasn't pathetic, it didn't warrant its own thread.

[anarky]

But it has Will Smith's kid, so it has to be pathetic.

[Rollo Tomassi]

Well, he won't be winning any Oscars, but in the world of child entertainers he's okay and shouldn't be singled out for being Will Smith's spawn. Like I said, I enjoyed it.

[vynsane]

Technically it should have been called the Kung-Fu Kid since it takes place in China and the kid learns Kung-Fu and beats ass in a Kung-Fu tournament at the end, but I suppose brand name recognition of the 'Karate Kid' franchise was a wise move on the Studio's part.

that's what's bothered me from the beginning... they could've called it 'the kung-fu kid' and marketed it as an add-on to the original series, as opposed to a remake. as long as they had the music in the trailers, wouldn't have been a problem. as it is, they have an inaccurate title, one that engenders and perpetuates the notion that all martial arts are called karate, and that they then have different names for the supposed sub-disciplines.

[Diabolical]

At one point, it was called the Kung-Fu kid, but "brains" at the studio changed it back.

One simple line in the trailer and movie could have helped change that.

Random kid: "What do you think you are, some sort of Karate Kid?"
Will Smith's kid: "No. Kung-fu."

Or something stupid like that.

[Rollo Tomassi]

I had the unfortunate privelege of sitting through half of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief the other day. I say half because after about 40 minutes I realized I could be doing ANYTHING other than watching it and it would be a better use of my time.

And this is a pathetic remake of all the Harry Potter films mixed with LOTR and Clash of the Titans, except it has teen actors who couldn't get roles on CW shows they were so bad and it was written by chimps.

Sadly, people like Uma Thurman, Joey Pants, Catherine Keener, and Pierce Brosnan were in it so my opinion of them all dropped considerably.

[anarky]

I saw part of Percy Jackson. Actually, most of it. Mrs A wanted to see it, and I didn't realize she nodded off about five minutes in. It was horribly predictable and two-dimensional, and possibly the biggest waste of talent I've ever seen.

Anyway, I was coming here to report I just read that MGM has a fourth Poltergeist movie and a remake of Mr. Mom in the works. Mr. Mom? Really? The first one was pretty funny, granted, but, Christ, could it be any more dated? "Man loses his job, so the stay-at-home mom gets a job while he becomes a stay-at-home dad and all sorts of hilarity ensues because guys don't know anything about kids and his staying home while his wife works is totally emasculating so he eventually gets a job and she quits hers to stay at home again and all is right with the world because dudes work and women stay in the kitchen." Really? Again, really?

I suppose it will star either Kevin James or Ice Cube. More likely, since Hollywood has apparently decided all comedies have to be "raunchy," it will star Seth Rogen and he'll smoke pot the whole time he's at home.

Hollywood has officially gone creatively bankrupt, methinks.

[Diabolical]

Not about remakes, but still applies to "creatively bankrupt."
As I posted on Facebook:
2011 will see a new record of 27 sequels (24 was the previous record in 2003).

http://www.slashfilm.com/2011-break-tim ... e-sequels/

[Rollo Tomassi]

And that list of sequels doesn't even take into account shit that's just old movies released with new titles.
Like 'The Roommate'. Which you probably saw the first time they released it and it was called 'Single White Female'

[anarky]

And that list of sequels doesn't even take into account shit that's just old movies released with new titles.
Like 'The Roommate'. Which you probably saw the first time they released it and it was called 'Single White Female'

I thought the same thing.

Given the tendency toward PG-13 movies over R movies, I doubt it has the masturbation scene.

[Rollo Tomassi]

And that list of sequels doesn't even take into account shit that's just old movies released with new titles.
Like 'The Roommate'. Which you probably saw the first time they released it and it was called 'Single White Female'

I thought the same thing.

Given the tendency toward PG-13 movies over R movies, I doubt it has the masturbation scene.

Which is a damn shame. mmmmm...Minka Kelly...

[Rollo Tomassi]

I keep seeing the trailer for the shitty 'Take Me Home Tonight' which looks like a shitty mash-up of several films. Its like they tried to cram as many cliches as they could in there. There's some License to Drive in there. Some Can't Hardly Wait. Some Superbad. And a bunch more I don't feel like listing.
I just feel bad for Topher Grace. He had potential over a decade ago. Now his legacy is a teen comedy without teens in it. Sad.

[anarky]

I never expected Kelso and Jackie to be the successful ones from That 70s Show, with Fez burning out quickly, Eric starring entirely in crap, Donna almost vanishing into thin air aside from the occasional shitty-looking TV cameo, and Hyde's career being only seen on milk cartons.

Funny thing, it looks like Kelso's fifteen minutes are almost up (and will be once Demi Moore dumps him), and Jackie will be the big winner.

[Rollo Tomassi]

I always thought Hyde had the potential for being the most versatile as far as going on to other roles. But yeah, that guy is the fucking invisible man.