faggot prison blues

[Zaphod]

i hear the faggs a-comin'
they're comin' round the bend
and i ain't seen no women
since i don't know when
i'm stuck in folsom prison
and the faggs keeping porking me
and here comes the guy who makes me blow him
he comes from san antone

when i was just a baby
my momma told me, son,
always be a good boy
don't mess around with faggs
but i fucked a man in reno
just to get a ride to the mall
when i feel the dick in my ass
i hang my head and suck balls

i bet there's rich guys fucking
in a fancy faggot car
they're probably tossing salads
and fucking with cigars
but i got to get to comin'
all over bob and steve
until they get their money shot
they just won't let me leave

well, if they freed me from this prison
if that faggot train was mine
i bet i'd move their dicks
a little farther from my behind
far from this faggot prison
that's where i want to be
and i'd make those big homersexuals
for a change they'd be blowin' me

[anarky]

You are just plain wrong.

[Bizarro The Grin]

i bet there's rich guys fucking
in a fancy faggot car
they're probably tossing salads
and fucking with cigars

tHAT WOULD BE ME AND YOUR DAD. hE GOT THE IDEA ABOUT THE CIGAR FROM mONICA lEWINSKY.

[unlimitedpudding]

Speaking of gay prison songs, how about this one from Elvis that I didn't even have to modify. I highlighted the good part.

The warden threw a party in the county jail.
The prison band was there and they began to wail.
The band was jumpin' and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone,
Little Joe was blowin on the slide trombone.
The drummer boy from Illinois went crash, boom, bang,
The whole rhythm section was the purple gang.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
Come on and do the jailhouse rock with me.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

The sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
Way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
The warden said, hey, buddy, don't you be no square.
If you cant find a partner use a wooden chair.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.

Shifty Henry said to bugs, for heavens sake,
No ones lookin', nows our chance to make a break.
Bugsy turned to Shifty and he said, nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks.
Lets rock, everybody, lets rock.
Everybody in the whole cell block
Was dancin to the jailhouse rock.